Donnie on the Mount -- Bible Camp II - T-59

As it is not written:

And the Little Golden Rich Boy who Would Be King went up to the Hillock 

and spoke to a Wave-a-White-Folk:

Blessed are those who don't get captured: 

for they're heroes. (comp. Matthew 5:3)

Blessed are those who mourn: 

if they aren't Muslims. (comp. 5:4)

Blessed are the meek: 

as long as they're not Moi. (comp. 5:5)

Weak are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness: for they will be screwed. (comp. 5:6)

Blessed are the Counterpunchers: 

for they don't need  mercy. (comp. 5:7)

Blessed are the serial adulterers: 

for they will see Stars. (comp. 5:8)

Blessed are the Peacemakers: 

and all other firearms. (comp. 5:9)

Blessed are those 

White-Folk who aren't Mexicans: 

for them was built the City on the Hill. (comp. 5:10)